Creeps Galore

I went to Safeway and purchased some garlic bread, because I was famished. I drove out of the parking lot and was making a left onto Broadway. Waiting quasi-patiently, I sat in my car, listening to the new Jose Gonzalez, which has made me a complete human, and two guys are attempting to walk by me on the sidewalk. Yes, I'm one of those jerks who pulls into crosswalks and walkways, effectively blocking pedestrians. But, guy #1 peers into my front passenger window, which was rolled down, and says, "Hey sweetie, could we get past?" I said, "Oh yeah, sure." Then guy #1 leans on my car, shoves his head through the window, and says, "You look pretty cute today. My name's Mike. How're you?" Okay, first of all, why in god's name would someone feel like he could just stick his face in my car? Secondly, I look cute today? Today as opposed to what day? Why are you an insane crackhead inside my car? Then he sort of just leaned on my car, expecting me to introduce myself, because intersections are great places to socialize. I said, "I'm trying to drive across the street." He took his creepy face out of my car, grinned, and then joined guy #2 walking eastbound on Broadway.

I don't even know.